Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
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That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
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