Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
Randomize
