i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
she asked me if the dress made her look fat, i told her no - the fat made her look fat.
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
