i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
Me. At least after what I've been through.
porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
Do me a favor. Next time I think it's a good idea to take pulls from the handle, yell "FALCON PUNCH" and uppercut me in the taint. My future liver thanks you.
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
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