I want to stick my p in your. b.
do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
Just hit on a girl with the line, "You look like Natalie Portman if she did drugs". Strike 1
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
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