why do cheetos always look like penises
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
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