Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
you know you're not getting laid when you start breaking awkward silences with quotes from Robot Chicken
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
This show inspires me to have sex in space
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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