shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
I was talking to this girl who was in love with the air force. I was doing decently until I mentioned that the navy actually has more planes. Cockblocked by my knowledge of random trivia again.
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
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