You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
Our Uber driver pulled over to show us Tinder some dick pics. Top that.
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
Randomize
