then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
On Tinder, guy asked me if I had ever been fucked by a Pokemon master. Needless to say I didn't respond.
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
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