There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
Last night she showed me how to clean my bowl and now she's drunk making peanut butter filled cookies. Best. Roommate. Ever.
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
Randomize
