i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
Randomize
