Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
I been sleeping but occasionally wake up feeling like tiny elves are in my throat ripping my esophagus to shreds with their bare hands.
Somehow, you made that sound extremely magical and not at all painful.
I've discovered the best way to avoid rehab is to not fuck fat chicks when your drunk, therefore delaying regrets and rock bottom
your the Dr. Phil in my life
Today is an unchanging day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
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