We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
I just came so hard I farted. Twice. Thank God I'm alone.
on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
this is the second day the intern has gotten me coffee. he either wants to bang me or thinks I'm more important than I am.
either way he's in for disappointment
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
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