its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
So how do you explain to your boss that Siri called him mid sex?
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
Randomize
