Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
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