do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
Randomize
