I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
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