ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
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