Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
Randomize