in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
Why is there a water bottle full of red wine on my desk this morning?
See you tonight.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
Randomize
