The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
You can kiss the security deposit goodbye after you and your boyfriend did donuts on his moped in the middle of the apartment. It was impressive since you were both too drunk to walk.
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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