I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
I get so lonely sometimes I set my phone's alarm to go off every 5 minutes or so and imagine people are texting me.
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize
