How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
i gained so much weight this year, i put on my string bikini underwear and couldnt see the string anymore! i hate my life.
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
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