then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
Randomize
