I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
I woke up, mistook him for my ex, and started screaming. It was all that chest hair. I don't think this relationship is going anywhere.
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
Just found out what was wrong with Esther. Turns out she's 33 and still not married. This explains everything.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
A woman with Alzheimer's pointed at me and said, "Don't forget to wear socks, because you're a lady!" I think it's legit advice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
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