i was born a porn star she said
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
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