Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
as i was trying not to drunkingly fall off her toliet, i noticed her socks laying there. i quickly grabbed them, ran upstairs, and excitingly asked her if she had gotten them at sams club. she replied with, "...those are your socks."
Randomize
