So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
