Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
I just learned how to imitate a trains smokestack. The downside is it makes you look like you ate cocaine. The upside is YOU LOOK LIKE A TRAIN
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
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