Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
Randomize
