we're blogging at a bar
I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
Randomize