Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
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He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
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