You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
Skipping work because i'm still too drunk from last night still. got home at midnight and passed out in front of my door for 2 hours bc i couldn't find my key
had to call my rooommate to let us in. Passed out in my dress and found the key on my hair tie-in my hair- just now.
i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
If the people you’re with use the word tequila in a sentence with phrases like hair of the dog or breakfast of champions...run awsy
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
