The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize