the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
Randomize
