The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
Randomize
