Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
Woke up with a chicken parm sandwich in my clutch. Aaaand I'm eating it.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
Randomize
