I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
Randomize
