And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
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