she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have straight up perfected the art of amazing manicures with shaky-as-fuck adderall hands. Also, I'm way too proud of this.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
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