Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
OPIZZABONMYDICK
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
Randomize
