Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
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