I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
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I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
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