Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
he told me I talked like a deaf person
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Got drunk and tried to deep fry burritos. Turns out wild turkey isn't a good replacement for vegetable oil. Nearly burned my house down.
Sober people should be as daring as drunk people more often, because honestly the fact you’ve lived so long is a sign that anything is possible.
Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Randomize
