..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
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