I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
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