he wants to bone in the snuggie
Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
tonight lets celebrate not being married
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
Favorite thing said to me in 2012: It's like you have two tongues!
Were you keeping a list?
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
Randomize
