You just made me feel so damn special
If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
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