So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
Drunk me really does appreciate that sober me made a list of movies to watch when drunk it saves so much time
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
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